I'm Mad As Hell and I'm Not Going To Take It Anymore!

Okay, so I'm not really that mad. Just really, really frustrated.

Well, I've been on a bit of a tear lately, blasting members of the media who say stupid things without doing their research. And it might be easy to feel as though that tear is naturally going to slow.

But you'd be wrong. Like Chris with the "movie slump" talk...each instance of stupidity in the NFL/NHL media I find only makes me more upset. And, as Wallace says of the rabbits infesting his town in The Case of the Were-Rabbit, "They're multiplying like...well...rabbits!"

Last night after work I turned on the radio for my drive home...106.7 the Fan. In the span of three minutes I heard two of the most ludicrous statements a sports analyst can make.

-Joe Biddle, sports writer for the Tennessean, said...of why he thinks the Colts won't win the Super Bowl:

"They're just one Peyton Manning injury away from being an average team."

Do I need to go into great depth here explaining why this is an idiotic statement? EVERY team, if they lost their star quarterback or star player, would be an average team. You can make that statement of Biddle's for any NFL team.

Here, watch me do it: "If the Steelers lose Big Ben to injury...they're done."

"If Tomlinson gets hurt, the Chargers are less than average."

"If Shawn Alexander breaks his neck while practicing his cartwheels, the Seahawks are over."

See how easy that is? These kinds of statements are the lowest form of analysis. They qualify as NOT NEWS. It's like saying, "If the plane carrying the Titans back from a road trip explodes in mid-air...they're season is almost surely done." Or, "If the Eagles suddenly decided to fire their roster and replace them with synchronized swimmers...they won't win another game."

It's called Stating the Obvious, and paid sports writers and talk hosts should never do it.

-Then Blake Fulton comes on and says that he doesn't think the Colts are good because:

"...even though they're 7-0, that doesn't make them the best team."

Where to start on this one? Basically, Blake is saying he doesn't think wins and losses are a good measure of which team is best, which ultimately means that he can never call a Super Bowl Champion the best team of that year....because they WON the game. I guess he'd rather use his own keen intuition to determine which team is best. And if we're going to throw out wins as a measuring stick for this title of 'best team' then I guess the new one could be anything...from uniform colors to who does the best end-zone dance.

What an idiot.

Remember, my biggest beef is that they get paid to do this for a living, and they're not only no better at it than we would be...they're worse.

-But here's the capper. Here's the one that stole the show. Are you ready for some REALLY uninformed opinions? Then look to Charles Robinson, who holds the prestigious title of National NFL Writer for Yahoo Sports. He's the guy who posts the NFL Power Rankings every week.

His new column is mostly harmless...except for this little doozy:

(listing his teams in the Muddled Middle) "Tennessee Titans (2-6) � Is it just me, or does Jeff Fisher complain about bad calls more than any coach in the league?"

Freaking What? Is it just me, or did you just personify foot-in-mouth syndrome? Is it just me, or did you just say something so completely opposite of the truth that the universe should be unraveling?

Here's my response I e-mailed him:

"Regarding the November 1st Power Rankings, and your ponderings on Jeff Fisher:

It IS just you, Charles.

First, Jeff Fisher is on the Competition Committee, and has been for quite some time. As such, he fields far more questions from the media regarding controversial calls than an average coach. Just because you see him answering a question about an iffy call doesn't mean he's whining.

Second, did you even see the play, or did you just read a soundbite about Fisher mentioning a bad call and draw your conclusions? There was no illegal tackle on that play, there was only two guys who bumped into each other.

Third, the guy on whom the penalty was called was not even in the game during that play! And mis-identification of penalty-committing players often occurs when the ref making the call is 45 yards away!

Lastly, I listened to Fisher's press conference on Monday live, and he could not have sounded more relaxed and unbothered about the whole thing--which is how he always sounds and why we Nashvillians love him. He's fair. He said the call was bad, but that he understood why it was made and there was nothing to do about it. He's not even sending tape to the league office.

If you want to talk about whiney coaches, please direct your attention toward someone that actually whines. Thank you."

There you go. I should be done ranting about this type of thing for at least the rest of the day. "Should" being the operative word. Never know what sort of dumbness I'll read next.