Deuce Bigalow 2

Deuce Bigalow: European Gigolo (Director: Mike Bigelow)

I know, I know. Mike Bigelow is directing a movie called Deuce Bigalow: European Gigolo? Kind of reminds me of when Arthur Hiller decided to pull the "Alan Smithee" clause when he was unhappy with changes made to his movie, An Alan Smithee Film: Burn Hollywood Burn. This is Bigelow's first movie, if that is indeed his real name. I sincerely doubt it. The official site makes note of the funny "coincidence." This is a sequel to the 1999 hit, which was distributed by Disney's Touchstone label. After refusing to make a PG-13 sequel for the same label, Rob Schneider and associates made the R-rated movie at Sony's Columbia Pictures.

I'm a fan of the absurd, and I liked movies like Billy Madison and Happy Gilmore for that very reason. And it's hard to be critical of a film that's just being silly. And while the original Deuce Bigalow provided some OK laughs, it never truly embraced the anything-goes mentality of Adam Sandler's gimme-a-break early comedies. But now we're in 2005, and Rob Schneider has been around for over 15 years with "SNL" and his various film roles, and this movie reeks of desperation and sadness.

In this chapter of man-whore Deuce Bigalow's (Schneider) life, he makes a trip to Amsterdam to meet up with his old friend and former pimp T.J. (Eddie Griffin). Amsterdam is the prostitution mecca of the world, and the top he-bitches can be found here; they've even formed a union. Trouble is, the man-whores are being offed by a mysterious whistling blonde. Investigating the matter is Detective Gaspar (Jeroen Krabbe, best-known for his work as Dr. Charles Nichols in The Fugitive), who has a niece with obsessive-compulsive disorder (gorgeous Belgian Hanna Verboom). Gaspar believes that T.J. is the killer, and caught in misleading circumstances, also believes he is gay, very gay (for shame!). Bigalow sort of goes undercover and starts his man-whoring again, and like the first film dates a variety of women with some sort of extreme handicaps or defects.

It's just lacking imagination. It's shot poorly, and it doesn't seem to give a damn about the viewer. It says, "I'm a dumb comedy, so there." You need to at least make it look like you tried. It gets some laughs here and there when it does finally hit those absurd notes, and you can count on Eddie Griffin to make any stupid-ass film seem like it's his pleasure to perform in it. Schneider utters the four millionth "Check, please!" joke in film history.

It may be a sad state of film this year when a movie like this may be unable to crack the Worst 10. But it will get mention. The best reason to see this is Hanna Verboom, and I'll save you the trouble if you'll just click this link.