NFL PREDICTIONS

It's been a few years since I've attempted to do this, and there are plenty of good reasons. Mostly, I'm always wrong. But it's fun to try, and if I ever actually get something right I can brag later. I challenge the rest of the L&N guys to get their picks in as well, and then whoever is the least wrong can brag an ass ton at the end of the year. The lady to the left wants you to make some picks, and so how can you say no to that? That would be plain rude.

Anyways, here goes. Let's see how much I fuck this up.

NFC EAST
1. NEW YORK GIANTS
2. PHILADELPHIA EAGLES
3. DALLAS COWBOYS
4. WASHINGTON REDSKINS

I have to go out on a limb in some of these divisions, and I'm sorry, but I have no faith in the consensus pick, the Dallas Cowboys. I like that Coughlin's job is on the line, and I like the QB that Eli Manning is becoming. They also have a great wide receiver core, great tight end, an interesting running game, and a good defense. Kolb looks to be primed for an Aaron Rodgers type year of proving people wrong about whether or not the Eagles should have held onto McNabb. I don't think he's as good as Rodgers, but he will put up some numbers. And the Redskins could actually be a huge suprise; a lot of people are making them their wild card pick. But Shanahan was so much better when he had Elway, but weren't we all? I do think Clinton Portis is nowhere near done and should put up some impressive numbers for what that's worth.

NFC NORTH
1. GREEN BAY PACKERS
2. MINNESOTA VIKINGS (WC)
3. DETROIT LIONS
4. CHICAGO BEARS

The one thing I'm fairly certain of is that the Packers should have the best record in the NFC and the Detroit Lions should be a hell of a lot better. The Vikings will still be in the mix and there might only be a game seperating the two, but Favre's numbers will come back to reality and Petersen will still fumble the damn ball no matter what BS he is spouting. He will also realize how much he misses Chester Taylor when Toby Gerhart's scrawny ass proves to be a bust. Sydney Rice being out half a season doesn't help either. The Lions/Bears thing is kind of a toss-up (Both teams will probably be in the 6 win range. More gut than anything else.

NFC SOUTH
1. ATLANTA FALCONS
2. NEW ORLEANS SAINTS (WC)
3. CAROLINA PANTHERS
4. TAMPA BAY BUCS

I probably should pick the Saints to win this division, but the reality is no team has repeated as division champ in the NFC South since its inception in 2002. So until that happens I'm not picking against it. Plus it's not like the Falcons don't make sense. That Saints defense scares the hell out of me and should scare the hell out of Saints fans even more. The Panthers might pull off an 8 win season, but I can't see much more than that, and who will be their QB? The Bucs should have the number 1 pick next year which will do them a lot of good when the strike happens right after the draft.

NFC WEST
1. ARIZONA CARDINALS
2. SAN FRANCISCO 49ERS
3. SEATTLE SEAHAWKS
4. ST. LOUIS RAMS

It's a pick straight from the gut. I think 8-8 wins this division so it's not like I think the Cardinals are world beaters. There are a lot of questions with both the 49ers and the Cards, but everyone else is going with the 49ers so I'm going against the grain. Sue me. The Seahawks would be a pretty upset special kind of pick, but the QB situation raisies even more issues than Arizona's similar predicament. Love their running game; Forsett could have a breakout season. The Rams should have the number 2 pick in the draft next year.

AFC EAST
1. NEW ENGLAND PATRIOTS
2. MIAMI DOLPHINS
3. NEW YORK JETS
4. BUFFALO BILLS

I think the Jets have pissed the Patriots off enough for them to show why this division has been their's to lose for the past decade. The Dolphins could go either way, but I feel good about it. The Jets will find out why bragging a lot and spending a lot of money rarely wins anything close to a championship; see Dan Snyder for a good reference. And the Bills will be showing up and trying their hardest I'm sure.

AFC NORTH
1. BALTIMORE RAVENS
2. PITTSBURGH STEELERS (WC)
3. CINCINATTI BENGALS
4. CLEVELAND BROWNS

I've been pretty high on the Ravens, and I still think they had the best offseason. However, when I started typing this out this was much harder than I thought. Looking at the Steelers schedule, if they can manage to go just 2-2 with Big Ben out of the picture, there is no reason to think they can't be 11-5 when all is said and done. And I predict Mendenhall will be the league's top rusher. It will be close, but I'm sticking with my gut and picking the Ravens to win the division. The Bengals will still be pretty good and might cause some problems for both of the top two teams. The Browns should have a pretty good draft pick next season.

AFC SOUTH
1. INDIANAPOLIS COLTS
2. HOUSTON TEXANS (WC)
3. JACKSONVILLE JAGUARS
4. TENNESSEE TITANS

As long as the Colts have that fucker, Manning, it's hard to pick against them. The Texans should be able to eke out a 10 win season; good enough to get them in the playoffs. Gotta love that offense, and they have a pretty damn good defense as well. Schaub's health is always an issue, but he made it through all of last season with barely a scratch so let's hope that was a good sign. Probably a dick move to put the Titans last, but no matter how you swing it, Chris Johnson is not the deciding factor. That would be Vince Young, and I just don't have enough faith in him to believe much has changed. The defense is suspect as well; especially when you realize they are seriously considering bringing back Haynesworth. The Jags match up pretty well in every area; Jones Drew isn't that far off from Johnson, is he? Still could go either way, and if Young proves me wrong maybe they are vying for 2nd place and the last wild card berth. The Titans have ways of sneaking in there.

AFC WEST
1. KANSAS CITY CHIEFS
2. SAN DIEGO CHARGERS
3. OAKLAND RAIDERS
4. DENVER BRONCOS

Did I really just type in the Chiefs in the number 1 spot? Yes I did, and I hate the Chiefs, so fuck off. These are my picks. There has to be a couple of big suprises, so why not the Chiefs. They've slowly been building their team in the right direction, but they do have a pretty awful QB at the helm. But sometimes great running games and good defense make up for that and the Chiefs have both. The Chargers will put some points on the board, but they are putting a lot of faith in a rookie running back. The Raiders and Broncos both look about the same. I would love to say my Raiders will have that turnaround season, but that schedule is rough. Maybe 6 wins; I'm hoping for 7.

NFC CHAMP - GREEN BAY PACKERS

AFC CHAMP - BALTIMORE RAVENS

SUPERBOWL WINNER - GREEN BAY PACKERS

That was fun.